2003-10-29. The Rabbit Girl at Work
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There�s this girl at work who�s this kind of Midwestern-y, grinny, tall, yet sausage-y girl at work that has stringy wavy badly blonde High School hair circa 1987. She�s obsessed with football and soccer and is usually in some soccer jersey with a checked red and white skirt and socks with her sandals. She�s the kind of girl, that at 26, you know still has a sticker book and a huge stuffed animal collection. She seems like she�d be a prime Outward Bound candidate if she weren�t such the dredge of Americana: Apple Pie and Pollyanna.

She creeps me out.

But mostly she creeps me out because she is obsessed with Lop Eared Rabbits. The license plate of her red 2000 VW beetle says LOP LVR or some shit. She has one � well I guess she has two now. Mind you I don�t talk to this girl because, well, she scares me, but it scares me that I know the census of her rabbit collection since every holiday for the past year she passes out cards for the holiday�s that are her rabbits in silly outfits, looking fat, miserable and begging for someone to end it.

My coworker loves it and has them all over her side or the file cabinet (along with a photo of every other pet owned by an employee). So daily when I go to use her printer I am mesmerized and horrified at the pictures of these rabbits. One of him hanging out the window of her VW with all these flowers in the window with him, one of the rabbit in a cowboy hat and overalls, one of him dressed like a leprechaun, one of him out in the yard dressed like a soldier with an American flag in a battlefield.

Fucked up I tell you.