2003-04-10. Rant
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I think that my current digrunteled attitude towards my living situation is in large part due to the fact that I am really unhappy about not living with Alyx. There, I'll admit it. Not only do I not have enough space, I want to strangle my roommates pets, imagine bodily harm happening to my upstairs nieghbors and live in a hood with too many vatos BUT I fucking hate the fact that I have to go over to his house to see him. It's just gotten worse lately. He hasn't come to my place in several weeks. And it's fucked because I know my place is a lot smaller and has the cat (he's allergic, but is on meds for it now) and i let him keep my playstation at his place and he had booze, but for fucks sake! I'm tired of the overnight bag! Of the scrambling from house to house to job. Hell, it's part of the reason I gave away my dog! I know that it was fucked for her and that it wasn't going to change anythime soon. Wow... I haven't really admitted that before...

I mean, it'll be three years come summer. We both know that we want the other person for life. We've known for a while now. I just want to get serious about it. I'm starting to feel like the exhiled girlfriend. I come to his place and we go out and we fuck and we get drunk and we play video games, but then I leave and he gets it easy...

I mean. I like my alone time, don't get me wrong, but I'm feeling all wierd and old or something lately. I don't know what it is.

I should have bought some beer tonight...

Oh yeah, did I mention that I got a commercial agent? Go me...